Yes, Your Teen is Crazy!: Loving Your Kid Without Losing Your Mind
A**R
Great book
A great read. Was very helpful.
D**E
Good common sense & a lot of great tools and tips for raising teens
I have 2 adolescent kids, one in mid teens, one about to enter. We have frustrating times, some minor, some more serious. Talking to other parents, I heard the following: "Oh you'll get them back in 5 years or so", "Fasten your seat belt for the next 8 years" and so on.Though meant to reassure (this is just a phase, albeit a long one), I was disheartened too that the next years would be rough, I'd be best to just tolerate them, and by the time they snap out of it they'll be in college and gone, so goodbye kids, let's get through it.I did NOT want the remaining years of my kids at home spent that way! I want a relationship with them. Okay, not the sweet kids that once were, but these teens who are on a great journey into adulthood!What a relief to find this book! Though my kids aren't near some of the extremes mentioned, I gained a lot from all of it. The book is eye opening, frightening, has made me laugh, cry, examine myself thoroughly, realize a whole boatload of things about myself and my teenagers & wish I'd read this before my oldest hit adolescence. That said, it has some great reassuring messages: this is a passage kids travel and there are great ways to handle it so you can re-establish or maintain a good relationship with your kids.If you are struggling with a snapping opinionated (or even out of control) teen and you are mourning the loss of you sweet, kind, loving pre-teen, thinking you've lost your child, then don't hesitate. Pick this up.Be prepared for some scary tales and statistics and to read 'from the couch' notes that will be alarmingly like your situation. They give MORE reason to carry on with the book, to tool you up to be the lighthouse your kids need in these tough years - in an era where been a teenager has more complicated and different challenges than most eras beforehand. Since finishing the book, I have been putting into practice some of what I learned. And wow, instant results on some things, and small progressive steps on others.The first 1/3 of the book covers kids: what's happening to them, their generation and individually.The second 1/3 looks at us, the parents. What's changed so we have to change our parenting methods, what baggage we might have, and what we might be doing right or doing wrong, and what are role is and needs to be.The last 1/3 is the nitty gritty "what to do when..." - covers everything from dealing with teenage tantrums, curfews, drinking & drugs, sex, schoolwork, chores... the lot.At times, you'd be forgiven for thinking Bradley is about letting kids have their rages and we have to ignore, but it's not at all.It's more about ~i) as the parent, don't come over as the bad cop. Be the calm one so you gain more authority and respectii) don't sweat the small stuff. Build a bank of respect so when you meet the bigger and harder teen issues, you have far more power over your childiii) 'fear and control' is not the same as 'respect and authority'. Learn the difference and your teen will behave outside the home, not just when you're aroundiv) Gaining respect includes ~not always having to have the last word; not getting into shouting matches; being the parent not their buddy (a parent is far better and more important than a buddy!); apologizing when you mess up or lose control; forgive them and ask them to forgive you; being strong and calm; listening listening listening; ask questions, don't lecture; letting go of your emotional need to have your sweet little pre-teen backv) Inoculate don't control. You know the saying "Integrity is how you behave when no-one is watching" - well, this teaches you how to teach that to your kids.Great book and one I will be re-reading over and over. I bought on Kindle then bought a paper copy to share.
M**P
Great Book!
This book had some very good advice for dealing with a teenager. I recommend.
K**2
Good but could be better.
I am only halfway through this book. I am a mix of fascinated and frustrated with it so far. The author has some very good science regarding the development of a teens brain which i find so very interesting as well as his experience with teens. His writing has, I think, a good mix of humor and seriousness to deliver this important information. My frustration is that this book is copyrighted in 2003 and things have already changed hugely. The influence of smartphones and "social media" (virtual communications) that our teens now have direct access and addiction to is pervasive and brings a whole new level to parents struggle in keeping them safe and on firm ground. I would LOVE to see this book updated to cover this new era of teenage-hood. Like I said, however, I am halfway through. I can update later because maybe somewhere in there there is the information I'm looking for possibly. Regardless, it's a decent book with good information in understanding the teenage mind.
P**N
Easy to read, lots of good insight
A couple I know who has a troublesome older teen recommended this book as my kid just became a teen. I'm savoring the bond we have and know from watching others that teen years can morph your kids into other beings. I've got a lot of helpful insight from this book and it seems to draw on many years of professional experience of the author and colleagues. I see things I'm doing right, and situations where it might be helpful to alter my perspective or communicate in ways that might be more receptive. Every situation is not right for every parent/child, but this book has a lot of helpful guardrails for parenting teens IMHO. Highly recommended. Highly.
A**R
Perfect summer read for our teenage daughter who arrives home from camp tonight!
Our daughter will greatly benefit from the understanding God's perfect design for girls. The 3-Step for lasting growth is focused and very practical. Thanks Jimmy and Grace! We are buying copies to gift to our community.
S**.
Thank YOU!!
This book is 100% counterintuitive of everything I ever knew about parenting, but it works!! I am the single parent of a teen with a man who does not believe in co-parenting. I thought my daughter and I had a normal parent/child relationship, but when my child finally returned from a visit this summer- severely brainwashed and alienated- it was the techniques in this book that broke down the walls - almost immediately. Now, it didn't cure everything, but it helped me to make that first crucial inroad into her world to try to repair the damage done over the visit by her father and his family who are actively grooming her hate me, actively undermining my authority in my home, all in an attempt to change custody. Since I have already gone down this road with her older sibling, I recognized what is going on behind the scenes early this time around.I am now in counseling to assist me in changing my parenting style and my child will start with her own counselor soon. It is my sincere hope that between the advice of Dr. Bradley, through his book and website, and professional counseling we can get our relationship back on track. Like every parent all I want is for my child to grow into the best person she can be. Someone with compassion, respect for herself and others, goals, etc.Thank you, Dr. Bradley, for this lifeline when I thought I was drowning in a sea of confusion, disrespect, personal attacks from all sides, and a growing chasm between myself and my child. Only time will tell what the outcome will be, but I believe we have made a good start. Our home is peaceful again. We laugh together and enjoy each other's company again. She is more respectful of the home boundaries and less prone to sulking because she didn't get her way.I highly recommend this book.
G**L
Fantastic book
I loved this book. It is so well written with great advice and no judgement. I liked how the author told it as it is. I really appreciated all the examples given too which made it easier to grasp the concepts.This book has helped me to be a better parent already. Thank you
L**T
Brilliant book. Gives me a better understanding of my ...
Brilliant book. Gives me a better understanding of my child's world and how can have a positive interaction.
M**D
Must-have for parents even of good, sane teens
Full of insight and humour, this book is packed with really wise and practicale advice. Even if your teen is not hell-on-legs, or is still well pre-teen, you'll gain a lot from it. Some of the bits about technology and brain development aren't band up to date (the book was written on the early noughties) but this doesn't really detract from a superb, accessible read.
D**E
excellent!
Très bonne analyse du comportement de teen-agers, du role des parents dans le bien-être mental de l'enfant, et plein de conseils sensés sur comment faire face à un jeune en crise.
C**C
I am now trying to understand him better and helping him with the different tips
What an educational book! I thought I had the most dreadful grandson, but after reading and taking on the advice or suggestions, I am now trying to understand him better and helping him with the different tips.Happy grandma
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