Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples

The best single relationship book I have ever read. I was so impressed by it that I have used it in several classes. Hendrix considers that we fall in love with people who our unconscious minds tell us can help us complete our unfinished business from childhood. He explains why opposites attract -- and why those differences then begin to drive us crazy. By the middle of the book, you are ready to despair--but then he devotes the second half to the solution, the "conscious marriage." He gets very specific, with a couples quiz that can however be taken by one partner alone; suggestions; recommendations; and--exercises. Anyone who puts in even half the requested effort will end up, at the very least, knowing a good deal more about his or her partner.The book is not perfect. Deliberately aimed at a popular audience, the writing is sometimes too simplified. There are links and connections that can be inferred, but that are not spelled out in the book. And HH's optimistic methods are not likely to work for the deeply disturbed or traumatized individual, simply because the degree of change called for is too great.I give this book to every couple I know, straight or gay, who are getting married.

I really got a lot out of reading this book. My therapist recommended that both I and my partner read it to learn better ways to communicate and to ask for what we need from one another. I normally am not a fan of self-help books but I have to admit that this one was worth the time.

This book is more than a book for you and your partner. It helps you dive into your deepest self — all the way back to childhood. I’ve been through years of therapy but this book made me recognize things I’ve never acknowledged before. Way better than I expected it to be!!

Absolutely amazing!! It’s an easy read and Hendrix does a great job at explaining how our unconscious drives chooses our mate. Even if you’re single, this information could be helpful in bringing certain issues into awareness. This is by far the best book I’ve come across that discusses the science behind his theory and how to enhance the quality of your marriage.

With around 50% of marriages failing, it is pretty clear that many people are doing something wrong when it comes to chosing their mates. This book explains why people are so often drawn to those who challenge and,ultimately, also frustrate them..and how to turn many difficult relationships into successful ones. HOW does the author do this. In a nutshell:1. First, he makes readers aware of the possible unconscious forces that drive most of us to be attracted to those we love. This isn't a "quick fix" or "bandaid" type of psychology. Instead, it is filled with the type of insights that motivate readers to truly examine their own lives and to understand how their experiences guide the choices they make when selecting lovers and mates.2. That knowledge - about how one's past affects one's present and future - puts readers "in the driver's seat", no longer held fast by patterns of attraction that aren't clearly understood. Suddenly relationships, past and present, begin to make sense, especially when viewed in light of one's entire life.3. Armed with that knowledge, couples have a chance to really build a committed, solid relationship and to acknowledge why we are attracted by certain, often challenging, people - and why that might even be a POSITIVE thing, if handled the right way. Admittedly, there may be some very painful bumps in the road (good relationships often take hard work)..and there is the real risk of breakup, divorce, the end of a relationship. Awareness does not automatically lead to a successful relationship. Some relationships still end. But whether your marriage or relationship ultimately succeeds or fails, reading this book is likely to up your chances of building a solid, strong and committed relationship in the long run. This is a standout from The crowd when it comes to similar types of books. It is thought-provoking, enlightening and well worth reading. It should be required reading for many marriage prep classes.

Recommended to us, but seems outdated for the times.

I have read many books on relationships and this one is much better than any others I have read. My marriage was over except for signing the papers when I found this book and was so excited by it that I bought and gave one to my wife. Once she read it, things changed. Today we are still married and as happy as we have ever been. The book is so well written that it is very hard to put down. After 4 years of a turbulent relationship this book saved the good parts of our marriage and helped us deal with the bad parts. While you may find some of what he explains in other books his presentation makes more sense and it easier to understand and implement. I do not belieeve I have ever read a book that has had a bigger impact on my life than this one. If both parties are willing to read it with an open mind and are willing to consider his advice I think that you will be helped. I think what happend is just a miracle and this book is the reason.

A classic for couples - but good for anyone to read to have their eyes open about what happens in relationships...along with good suggestions to help.

The best and most useful book written on relationships. I use the Imago exercise with my therapy clients and it knocks them sideways - giving them insights and understandings entirely new (and shocking) to them. This book changes lives. If you are in relationship with another breathing / living human being and are finding it irksome, you should read this book.If you don't live in the US, you may struggle a little with the somewhat schmaltzy tone and folksy language .... but persevere. It is truly,magnificently worth it.

Probably the best book I've read on couples, and I've read many. It made sense of my own experiences and helped me be a more supportive partner as well as realise I need to express myself better. I've recommended to many friends who've all come back with positive insights from it.

I bought it following a Funzing talk given by Sex Specialist Colin Richards. It is absolutely brilliant and it makes so much sense why I am attracted to a specific type of guy based on my childhood. Absolutely fascinating! I totally recommend it!

Lovely book and very insightful, especially the first section. Got a bit boring in the second part but nevertheless I learnt a lot.

This book is possibly the most amazing book I have ever read and I’ve read some books!Every single page had something I could relate to so strongly.Whether your relationship is good or bad this book will provide you with the most powerful details to change your life forever.