My Secret Garden Kindle Edition

Informative

I first heard about Nancy Friday from "Men in Love", a collection of men's sexual fantasies. I found the fantasies in that book to be fascinatingly deep, thought out, and precious to the men who had them. You could actually see the world the man was building in his head. So when I heard there was a book by the same author about women's sexual fantasies I was very interested to see if they measured up.I was very saddened by most of these fantasies. The sexual world of women in this book, in my opinion, came off shallow and unconcerned with their partners pleasure. The fantasies seemed to only exist to allow the women to bear through the unsatisfying sexual experiences with their men since time after time the women make it clear these fantasies are used during sex and were always of other men. The beautiful chapters in Men in Love where men talk of getting aroused from giving pleasure are absent from this book since the few times a woman is giving a man pleasure, she is being forced to.While there is nothing wrong with these fantasies in general, putting so many of them in the book makes the book unbalanced. There are even several chapters dedicated to how a woman's sexual frustration can lead her to these fantasies! While I'm sure there are many sexual frustrated women, it made me sad that a woman's sexual world is put forth as simply a by-product of frustration, not a secret world that she loves, just like a man.My main issue with this is that in the introduction, the author herself reveals a traumatizing experience where she told a lover about how she was fantasizing about another man as they had sex. He became upset and left. So I can't help but wonder if the respondents that made the author feel "normal" were put in the book while women who fantasized about very different things (like their own husbands/boyfriends) were left out.The saddest outcome of this is that it makes women look like they almost have no attachment to men sexually. There isn't a love for men and the pleasure he is giving you (like there was in men's fantasies of women). It almost seemed like the women were simply using men just to get off, nothing more. And most of the time, it didn't seem to matter who the women were sleeping with. The men in their fantasies were just a means to an end. Some people might say it's liberating for a woman to be portrayed as men have been for years. But I think it does no justice to us to make our sexual worlds a place a man wants to know nothing about since he is lead to believe he isn't even in it. It makes our sexual world look like the place we retreat to to get back at him when he isn't satisfying us.The part of me that likes to peek into people's minds found some of the fantasies interesting but none of them stuck with me for their depth as the ones in Men in Love. In that book, I felt like the men were happy to finally reveal how precious these fantasies were to them and how much they longed to try them. I felt that the women in this book were more happy in finally revealing when they fantasized (i.e during sex) rather than how precious their hidden sexual world was.I thought my sexual world was going to be painted with the same beautiful brush a man's was painted with in her other book. But I found too much spiteful fantasizing in this book to feel like the woman's 'secret garden' was portrayed as skillfully as the man's.

I’m a 38 year old heterosexual male who has had more than his fair share of female sexual partners and serious girlfriends and I found this book VERY enlightening. It has changed the way I think about and feel towards women. Before reading this book I had NO IDEA that women had such a rich and varied sexual fantasy experience. It either constantly slipped my thinking faculties, or I reduced them to most likely fantasizing about me or the love making we were engaged in. Now I know better and I actually have gained more respect and awe at such wonderfully diverse and lovely creatures as the human female. This book also helped cure me of my feelings of jealousy and even monogamy! I’ve always been one to wish my partner the best orgasms and the most fulfilling time. How could I even be jealous now thinking that one of the ways to reach that goal is a rich, and varied fantasy life? How could I stress monogamy so much anymore, knowing that healthy sexual fantasies (and therefore a healthy mental and emotional life) may come from a place where multiple people and partners all come together as a team to please? I’m really glad this book was written because, as a man, I now have a better understanding of and sympathy towards what I think are the most beautiful and curious beings on this planet.

Honestly I am not sure if some the fantasies narrated in this book are wished for by the author, for, if they are real, these people are really sick and need medical attention. There are some fantasies narrated that are common and that we have heard of so much that they have become normal but there are many many more that are sick and despicable.I don’t want to say the book is all very bad, there are some interesting facts that will help a lot of men to understand their women, and it would have been a great one if it all went that way, but unfortunately, the major part of the book, over 70 % indirectly encourages abnormal sexual behavior in terms of cheating among married couples, relationships, incest, and having sex with animals!Although the author mentions it’s not her personal point of view, it is very obvious that she is supportive of that, and that is sick! We can see an example in page 161 line 15 the author seems to be into bulls or what bulls have!I really want to ask the author why does she think it should be mentioned in her book, and how does it help to tell us about a woman fascinating about her own mother! Brothers! Parents in law! Children!In page 199-200 we have a teacher fantasizing about the children in her classes! Another on page 217 should such teachers remain in their jobs?In page 148 we have a woman fantasizing about a 3 year old baby! How dangerous is that and why should be made public, doesn’t it indirectly encourage such sick people? Not only that but 3 year old child masturbating page153Rape! The author talks of so many women that fantasize about being raped, that is dangerous and demeaning to women!Adultery, so many fantasies in this book led their fantasizers to adultery!I do again hope that my perception of the author as being sick, as sick as some of the people in her stories, is wrong!i gave the book two stars and not one, for the language and style of narration!

So this book is basically a few sentences from different women explaining their fantasies. there is some strange ones for sure.

The media could not be loaded.  Been reading it for a while now. Weirdly enough, the book doesn't have the save cover art as in the amazon page, but it still came in perfect form and the cover thing isn't that big of a deal. Recommended.

I thought I had ordered the original My Secret Garden by Nancy Friday, as mine had gone missing. However, when I ordered this paperback, I thought something was wrong. When I received it, I immediately knew I had been conned in buying the wrong book. When selecting the paperback, it links to a poorly written study guide pretended to be the original version of My Secret Garden. PLEASE BE CAREFUL when choosing the paperback as it may be the study guide. I had to get the original version from Waterstones in the end.

This book was written in the late 60's/early 70's and the psycho-babble that she attempts to assign to each individual is very out of date. I'm unsure why this book would be considered as ground-breaking as it's simply exposing women and providing humiliation and titilation to both participant and reader alike - hence one of the reasons why Nancy Friday was never accepted as a feminist. Abhorrent book that holds no place in any movement of equality or acceptance of sexuality.

The original and best of Nancy Friday's collection of women's sexual fantasies. Eye opening in it's day, although there are now a lot of copycats around and even magazines get in on the act. Whether you want to study women's sexual fantasies or use them to get horny, a good read.

Eye opening for me. I didn't know women like I thought I did .I read it with an open mind and i was marvellously shocked at some of the reveals. Take home lesson for me: women have sexual urges and fantasies just like us men do and its perfectly normal.

Great book that literally hits the spot!